Y2J Stinger
by Y2Jen
Summary: A Peter Cottontail spoof. Vince warns his future superstars to never go near Ted Turner, but aroused by curiosity, Chris Jericho does just that.


Vince McMahon lives in Connecticut with his son Shane, daughter Stephanie and intern Triple H. They're all young aspiring young teenagers who Vince mentors so that they may possibly become wrestlers for him in the WWE. A month ago, he got a new young champ to train, a Canadian by the name of Chris Jericho. To show responsibility, each of his kids was given a title, Shane the Intercontinental, Steph the Women's, Triple H the World Heavyweight, and the newcomer Chris got the Cruiserweight. Now, before Chris came, Vince had many other superstars but that was all in the past, and a new neighbor lays responsible for taking them away. But Vince never told them the story, until today.  
  
"Alright guys." Vince said as he prepared to leave the house. "You can go play while I go get the new Hardcore title from the shop. You can go taunt the ECW kids or pick on the independents, but whatever you do, stay away from Ted Turner's WCW house."  
  
"Why's that?" The four teens ask.  
  
"When you were just babies, or even very small, we had Hulk Hogan, the greatest champ of all. He helped me to carry the WWE and could beat any opponent with ease. Business was pleasure every night, to give all the fans a great fight. We gad a lively federation, he worked with me and helped me build up my company to what it is today. The Hulkster would wrestle anyone, anywhere, anytime, and he was truly a worthy champ. From New York to Florida, he was it all the way, and there was nothing that he couldn't do."  
  
"Wow." Chris was intrigued by this story.  
  
"But one day, we got in a bad fight, and he went to Ted Turner's house. No time to make up or even say good by, Hulk Hogan had become a WCW alumni." Vince ended his tale, Chris and the others gasped. When they all went outside, Vince repeated himself for one last time, "You can go taunt the ECW kids."  
  
"Taunt the ECW kids." Stephanie and Shane giggled to each other.  
  
"Or pick on the independents."  
  
"Pick on the independents." Triple H smiled and punched his hands together.  
  
"But don't go anywhere near Ted Turner's."  
  
"Ok." Steph, Shane and Triple H nodded.  
  
"Chris?"  
  
"On the contract." Chris caught himself. "I mean, on the contrary."  
  
Vince wasn't satisfied, "And you won't loose your title again? Not like last time."  
  
"No sir." Chris crossed his heart. Vince was referring to a time when Chris lost his title in a street fight with some bully. But that wasn't the only time Chris was irresponsible.  
  
"Oh forget it." Vince sighed and left.  
  
"Let's go!" Steph, Shane and Triple H ran off down the road.  
  
But Chris, curiosity aroused by the fantasies that lay behind the gates of Ten Turner's house, walked away to explore. After making sure nobody had followed him or was looking, Chris got back, crouched down, ran and jumped over the fence, making it safely into the WCW yard.  
  
"I made it!" Now to look around.  
  
Meanwhile, Triple H had run off from the McMahon siblings and found a bunch of independent wrestlers to pick on. As he beat them up, he noticed one of them carried a torn and tarnished Light Heavyweight title. Trips recognized him as the bully that stole the title from Chris when he first came. Itching for a fight, and one at getting revenge, Triple H beat the bully up and confiscated the old belt.  
  
Elsewhere, Stephanie and Shane found their way to the ECW boarding house and laughed at the unlucky wrestlers, taunting and teasing them. Their laughter and joking caused the future ECW superstars to get angered, and they growled, "We may go under one day, but we'll take you with us. You WWE folks don't know what talent you could be throwing away." But the McMahon siblings just laughed at the ECW fantasies, little did they know the future that ECW would play in their company.  
  
Chris Jericho was looking around the WCW yard. There wasn't a sole around, everyone had probably gone somewhere to do a show, but Chris knew that there had to be at least one person at home. But just in case he might get into trouble, Chris decided to stick to himself and take it on his own to give himself the grand tour. In the yard around the house was an outdoor gym with every kind of equipment imaginable. Chris gasped in awe, the WCW talent must be pretty tough from all that kind of training. He went over and tried to lift the heavy weights, but he wasn't strong enough so he dropped them and the machine broke. Chris was one thing though, fast, and as soon as the weights fell from his hands, he was hiding safely behind another machine.  
  
"Whew." He whipped his brow and looked around. "That was a close one, I'd better be more careful."  
  
He continued around the house, in the front yard and on the sides was nothing but weight equipment and cardio exercises, but in the back was the true gem. Chris's jaw dropped at what he saw, a bonafide wrestling ring. Jumping for joy, Chris ran into the ring and looked around.  
  
"Wow, this is amazing!"  
  
He giggled and jumped on the ropes. He climbed the turnbuckle. He leaped back down into the center of the ring and posed, holding up the title as if he was the heavyweight champion of the world. Just then his keen sense of hearing picked up the sound of what seemed to be a door. He gasped and ran under the apron to hide. He peeked out and heard footsteps coming closer. The pair of boots stopped and then continued on, going into the back door of the house. Chris sighed with relief and waited until he thought it was safe enough to come back out. As he continued to explore, he realized something.  
  
"Somebody is home now." And without even thinking of the idea of going home, "I'd better be more careful when I look around."  
  
Chris snuck up against the wall of the house and looked through a window. He saw the shadow of a man go out the front door but it didn't close, it was left open a slight jar. Chris licked his lips and saw a dog door on the bottom of the back door. He looked around and then careful slipped in, not noticing that his title had slipped off his waist, it wasn't big enough to fit through the door while around him. Another title that Chris lost due to carelessness and irresponsibility. Chris stood up and found himself in the kitchen. He tip toed into the dining room and looked through the doorway, whoever was home was outside in front of the house waiting by the mailbox. Chris looked at his watch.  
  
"The mail doesn't come for about half an hour, I still have plenty of time."  
  
He walked into the den, which was filled with wrestling memorabilia. Trophy's, title's, autographed photos, video tapes, you name it. Ted Turner wasn't only wealthy in money but in superstar talent. Chris figured, it was no wonder Ted could give out all that money, the wrestlers deserved it. Slam. Chris gasped, the door closed. He felt his heart race as he looked from the notch in the wall. He sighed with relief, the wind had blown the door shut and the person was still outside. He caught his breath and then walked carefully into the huge living room, avoiding the windows. Chris saw stairs leading up to another level. That had to be the bedrooms of Ted's different superstars. Just then Chris froze and realized something, he had to go to the bathroom. He looked around and figured in a house this big, there had to be a bathroom downstairs as well as upstairs. He looked around but then heard a truck drive away. He gasped and turned around, it was the mailman.  
  
"Oh no."  
  
The man was headed back inside, Chris had to find a bathroom to hide in fast. If he was luck, the person would think he was just one of Ted's alumni. He finally found a door and closed it with him inside. He felt along the wall for a switch but found nothing, but he did feel something strange on his head. He put his hands up to find, coats?  
  
"Oh no, I'm in the closet!" Chris whimpered to himself.  
  
And if things couldn't get any worse, the man had heard Chris and opened the closet door. Chris gasped when he looked up at the man, "Who are you and what are you doing here?"  
  
"Uh, I, um."  
  
"So, a lost troublemaker hu?" The man put his hands on his hips.  
  
Chris gulped and stammered, "Are you Ted Turner?"  
  
The man's expression changed and he began to laugh. Chris was confused, but finally the man folded his arms and said, "I'm Hulk Hogan."  
  
Chris gasped, "You're the guy who left Vince!"  
  
"Vince?" Hogan understood now. "Oh I see, so you work for Vince hu." Chris gulped as Hogan began to think to himself. "Well fellow wrestler, just be glad I'm not Ted Turner, or else you'd be in some big trouble right now. But you still have to be punished for trespassing, and this isn't my house, so I'd better go report you to the authorities."  
  
Chris's jaw dropped in fear, "You're gonna call the police!"  
  
"No, I'm getting somebody worse than the police. Mr. Turner." Hogan closed and locked the closet door.  
  
Chris sighed as he shivered in fear in the closet, "I don't want to get in trouble! I wanna go home." He sniffed and whispered again to himself, "I wanna go home.."  
  
Chris stood up and felt the doorknob and gasped, he felt a lock button on it. He clicked it and the door opened. Chris didn't know what to say, this was too good to be true. He gasped, hearing Hogan's voice upstairs talking to Ted Turner. Chris ran to the door but it was locked, he didn't want to make noise to give himself away. He saw an open window, he climbed onto a reclining chair and jumped out but landed in the flower bed. Chris groaned but heard the voices from the window upstairs, they were obviously heading back down. Without thinking, Chris ran and jumped over the fence, and headed back home, never looking back. Finally Hogan and Ted Turner came downstairs and opened the closet to find nothing.  
  
Ted growled, "I'll get you yet, WWE!" But Hogan did find Chris's title on the back porch. Ted was satisfied, "Now we can use this belt for a new title, say, a Television title."  
  
Hogan nodded, "Yes, that is suitable."  
  
It was late in the afternoon now, it was getting dark as the night approached. Vince had long since returned, Triple H had run out of people to beat up, and the McMahon siblings had grown tired of laughing and joking. Chris finally made it back to the house and closed the door behind him, exhausted, leaned his back against it and slid down onto his but. Hearing the commotion, Triple H, Stephanie and Shane looked in through a passage into the living room to see Chris all tired and dirty.  
  
"Chris is back late." Stephanie whispered.  
  
"He's gonna get in trouble." Shane whispered.  
  
"Uh oh, where's his title?" Triple H asked quietly.  
  
The three of them laughed. Chris heard them but was too beat to care. Vince walked in and saw, he just sighed and shook his head. Chris got cleaned up and for loosing his title was grounded. Lucky for him, Triple H found his old belt so there was no real loss. Chris was put to bed without dinner, but Triple H, Stephanie and Shane didn't mind eating his share while watching tv. Vince came up to Chris's room to make sure he was in bed, the whole day's adventure had given him a slight fever. And to make sure he wouldn't have any fun, he would give Chris a dosage of NyQuil, and not the capsules either.  
  
Vince sat down with a spoonful of syrup, "Open up."  
  
"No wait!" Chris sat up. "I didn't loose my title belt, cause I know where it is."  
  
Vince waited, "Where?"  
  
Chris sighed and slumped down, "At the WCW house.."  
  
Vince sighed sadly, "Oh dear."  
  
"I'm sorry Mr. McMahon, but the whole thing just aroused my curiosity and intrigued me. But I got nearly got destroyed by Ted Turner, and I ran into Hulk Hogan and got into enough trouble already." Vince was shocked, Chris had run into Hulk Hogan? "And I was so scared, I thought I'd never see you or the others again. I just wanted to get out, it was all a big mistake, I didn't even think about the title, I was worried about my own hide."  
  
Vince paused to gather his thoughts before speaking back up to Chris, "You know, you made a mistake and you learned from it. But worrying about yourself and getting your skin out alive isn't a bad thing, you have good instinct. Thought it might want to improve your responsibility as far as being a champion goes. But you're still in training, we have time and room to improve. You'll learn from the past to improve your future. I just hope you won't make the same mistake Hulk Hogan did, now that you saw the consequences."  
  
Chris smiled, glad that Vince understood him but also that he was off the hook, "Thanks."  
  
But he hadn't gotten out of Vince giving him the NyQuil, "Open wide."  
  
Chris reluctantly opened his mouth slightly and Vince rammed it in, Chris swallowed to disgust and dismay, "Yuck!" And with that, Vince left Chris to bed.  
  
And they all lived happily ever after.. or so I would say if Chris's catlike curiosity hadn't been put to rest. Would Chris become a WCW alumni in the future? Oh dear! 


End file.
